Legal-ease

My legal troubles are all behind me now. All of ‘em.

After several boring interviews with people in the City Hall; mostly about me workin’ for the ex-Mayor and some about some disturbing the peaces and another couple about various DUI, public indecency and damage to City property; but after all those, they cleared me of all wrong doings.

They had slacked off on the questioning about me workin with the old Mayor for a while, but started up again after he was found dead a week or so ago. Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you guys, the ex Mayor is dead. Some shop owner was kickin bums outta the alley behind his place when he kicked this guy and the guy fell over. They said there was a huge hole in his chest and his insides were all gone. Cool. I mean, eww.

Anyhoo, they started bringin me in to ask if I did it or knew who did, and I was all like “Hey I liked the guy. He’s the one who said he was gonna destroy me. Can I get a donut too?” They were all like “Well, this really doesn’t fit his style. And he’s supposed to be one of the good guys. He has done more good than harm. Barely. Give him a damn doughnut to shut him up.”

On my way out I reminded the Police Capitan that I did get his cat outta that tree a few weeks back, without slingshotting it a couple hundred yards I might add, and asked him if that could help make a few other “oopsies” go away. He said that’s the only time I get to use the “Mr. Tinkles” card (Mr. Tinkles? Ha ha), and that he’d make it happen.

So I’m currently the only one of us A.S.S.es to have a squeaky-clean record. It’s pretty sweet to be able to hold that over their heads.

Now if you guys’ll excuse me, I’m all outta beer and I need to borrow Mofo’s car so I can go get some more and keep on celebratin’.

Laters,

Lc